surface of the moon & clenched daffodil fists:
i'm going home

one of those naked places--

the surface of the moon--

let me show you my spaceship--
i parked it in the garage

next to broken 
snapped hula-hoops 
& deflated basketballs--

this kind of cycle deteriorates
just like what we knew
of the four dead seasons--

beneath the dirt someone has
planted fists for spring

daffodils are clenching 
two knuckles forward--

my father taught me that's
how you punch--

we stand there in the backward 
in my white karate uniform 
as he holds practice boards--

cold march earth--

there is a violence in
being un-hidden--

harvested as her moon-rock
surface

our hometowns have
dangerous orbits--

it's always summer when
i come back--

i hate that i come back--
that there are ghosts of
me somewhere--

the soul of a swing set

she sits--

movie camera in hand--

are you okay with feeling
rural?

sometimes i think
i love the city so much because
there's so many more 
shadows crouch in--

here the sun is a flashlight
held-- staring down my iris--

pupils bursting
into closet doors--

i like to be naked but
not like this--

are they still fixing
the bridge on normal avenue?

phantom first kiss still
looming with dark brown 
hair & a gas station soda cup
in hand--

knuckles grow weeds--

i cut my tongue out
so i can stop saying

i'm going home
i'm going home
i'm going home

i say 

i'm going to the 
surface of the moon
where i was once born 

but that's a lie

home has a haunted driveway
for me--

sews me in the field
when the soil un-thaws--

there i am--

knees tucked into my chest
beneath the gnarly field--

& when the corn grows again 

i will stand there--

maze-like

headlights blinking--
prayer cards blowing like
autumn leaves--

fist opening to 
pick onion grass--

there's no air
here-- no sense of wind--

i have yet to give
up on our third grade promise 
to be an astronaut--

sleepless gravity
written on the sidewalk--

alien

i find my way to main street

where all the shops are closed

but there is of course
shadows in full bloom--

ones deep enough to 
be hidden--

when you find my space ship 
in the open bay of 
the garage 

forgive me--