gold coins

my uncle hides chocolate gold coins everywhere 
i see them  out my window in a line down the sidewalk 
but i don't follow them because he wants to take
me somewhere & i know he does & i don't know 
where that is it could be all the way to a museum 
to a museum with their metal clawed teeth
& revolving doors sharp with wanting i love him
i really do when my brother & i were kids we would
each get a sack of gold coins from god/my uncle
they would appear in shoes & in trails on the carpet
leading us into the bathtub or the closet
i spent three years in my closet eating the aluminum 
outside of chocolate coins while listening
to foot steps inside the walls of the house i ate
them slowly stacking them up first in little towers
sometimes gold coins fell from ceiling fans: 
scattering across the living room &
eagerly we'd rush to pick them up i think 
i punched my brother once for the last one
a clean swipe to his cheek followed by the glint
of falling flecks of gold more than the chocolate
i liked the taste of the metal like the shiny
wings of metal moths i'm not following those 
gold coins who knows what he wants me to do 
it might take me to box with a lock on the side
like the one he kept on the top of his fridge
full of sweet he called it a treasure chest
we don't talk much now when we do it's brief
a phone call with both of us chewing on either
end mouthful of gold coins gnashing shells
he takes the doors off my old closet filling
it with gold coins there should be more guidance
for how to remember people after they hurt you
i feel like i hurt him when i became a boy
i step on the gold coins like fat beetles 
their milk chocolate guts seeping out so i crawl
up the wall to lay down on one of the blades of
the ceiling fan thinking i might be safe there 
not tempted to follow any trail of coins 
but there he is up there too crouching on
the opposite blade he's got handfuls of coins
he puts a finger to his lips saying "i'm going
to surprise her, i've been waiting" he passes 
me a coin but i don't eat it i just drop 
the gold circle on the hardwood floor below.