my brother throws up a brown recluse spider

replace brother with dog.
the moon wanes so much it becomes
a rock held to the side of a mountain
with great sheets of mesh. i think
ha, the mountain is wearing
fish nets. 
the mountain 
is a slut. 
like a spider,
i could be crushed very easily
by the mountain's bolders.
i would twitch like 
an antenae trying to speak
the ant langue.
about the spider, 
there is so much to be afraid of.
it crawled from his mouth 
& bit his neck on the way.
there is no antidote 
for spider bites 
you just have to give in
& become a spider. 
what if i accidentally smash
my brother? i'm sure it's happened.
in the windowsill, i found the carcass
of a dead yellow-jacket.
it felt hollow & i wondered where
the insides escaped to.
are bees full of bolders too?
i would probably thrive
with an exoskeleton.
it might be easier to persuade
my family that i'm doing alright
and i'm going to be okay.
i defered payments on my student loans
& they are becoming bolders too.
a hole in the yard might lead anywhere
but i'm too big to fit down it.
i drop blueberries inside 
& try to listen but never hear
a splash. i was hoping it led 
to a den of mermaids. 
grass is overrated. wildflowers 
are catty & always critiquing 
the weeds who wonder what the difference is
between a wild flower & themselves.
the street is a staircase
into the mountain. the mountain will
one day be too big. it will eclipse 
the sun or turn into a spider.
my brother is alright. my dog
is my closest friend. she sleep on my chest
like a conch shell.