my father builds an aquarium in the basement fills it first with sharks & then with water. carries the water down from the kitchen sink in his cupped palms while the fish gasp & wriggle like door knobs. i watch tv & dad passes back & forth in from of me while the show giggles & flashes color. my brain turns off easily anymore. lets in whatever mouth wants to take over. tv show about who knows but at least it has texture. everything in the house is dull: knives, lightbulbs, even sharks teeth. dad tells the sharks to be patient while he fills their home. the sharks are smooth & when he's gone i hear them whisper about escaping in the nearby stream. i used to fear sharks in all bodies of water before i realized they're all trying to escape their fathers just like me. i ask dad if he needs any help & he assures me he has this covered. next, he lugs a huge bag of colorful little aquarium pebbles. i know the sharks will not be pleased. they are actually hungry & don't want to be babied. they are adult sharks & they prefer grey everything. mostly, dad's projects are his children. the habitat almost complete, he sets up a folding chair to stare at the sharks who cower in the far dim corner of the aquarium. dad tells them they are cool & sips a beer for his newest creation. i glimpse this from the wooden basement stairs. when dad falls asleep, i'll help the sharks slip out the back door & into the grass yard. blinkless animals, i see my own basements in their faces, pale with worry & sickly love. they don't want to leave my father when i come to collect them. i knew this would happen & it's true the aquarium is magnificent. giant walls of glass. even a little fake sunken ship for the sharps to play in. but none of that is why they want to stay. they yearn for a basement. i tell them the world is full of basements but they slip away & i return to the tv which has always known how to cradle my worries until they're nothing but blurred & blue voice beneath feet of water.