family crest w/o color

we gutted the squirrel 
of all his wires & found
a flag rolled up inside.
inheretance comes like this.
like you are killing a moon
& then it is spitting picture frames
at your feet & you have
to let it live.
my family comes from
talismen ferriers & traveling
sales people. for us, a doormat is 
a place of promise or at least
so we were told & so we tell others.
another crest comes in the mail.
each one is different from the last.
we look at the knots of corn
& ask "what could this mean?"
the trick is they tell you
we had horses or an apple tree.
a skull we burried & never spoke of again.
isn't that what it means to have a lineage?
a fear of what was burried 
& where the next tree will come from?
do you know there is a time in which
we will all be royal & then i guess
maybe none of us will be?
thank god. i'll be relieved of all the pressures
of false monarchy. i have a loose tooth
& when it falls out of my head
it is not a tooth but a dice.
rolls a one. go figure. on the crest
i see myself as the belly-up whale.
i'm gone. already gone but
i hope i'll be a feeding ground.
all the little creatures will come
with their forks & knives.
they will have a great feast of me.