spearmint heart

i eat the whole bush in one day,
white tower flowers & all.
feel my skull turn into a breath.
fist in a bowl of snow. we are walking
& you are just a few steps ahead.
it is raining or flurrying or we are
inside a painting where no one 
has any lines. i find roots beneath
the television. a sprout from the telephone. 
i an consumed by an almost. you are
right there & then you are not
& i am in the yard with the spearmint bush's ghost.
all the apologies i can dig from soil.
pilots who look down & see a city on fire.
that is my nest. those are my nestlings
who turned to thumb prints 
on the sidewalk. swallowing nothing
but spearmint. the bush returns
to feed me. says, "trust no one else."
my stomach becomes a fish bowl. beta fish 
& blue pebbles. i harvest everything i can.
leaf after leaf. i was just a girl. my hands were
still baby mice. pink & thoughtless.
i had to eat my hair to survive. it tasted 
like the vines reaching for their sun's kiss. 
you unwrap me & i am just a slice of gum.
sugar dust across my skin. i already know 
i do not consume enough to survive. 
soon, i will be a garden of ballons. 
hail that falls in the shape of eyes.
you will search on the cellar floor
for my mouth & find nothing but polaroids 
of the spearmint bush. wild & tangled lover.