these sand castle bodies, water fountain lakes &
instructions for my burial--

god builds us like sand castles--
gets down on his knees-- 
pockets full
of twig & acorn--
he points:
this is the draw bridge--
the mote-- the look out tower
& the flag made from a maple
leaf--
 
i spent a childhood
wearing sand in between my
toes from the pit at the park
where the hornets nested in the
rafters & the purple 
dinosaur ate mulch
from my hand--

when i die i want to be buried
next to my lost shovel &
plastic brontosaurus somewhere
at the bottom of the sand box
at the park-- i used
to want to be cremated
but i want to come back
& find all the lost toys
buried somewhere underneath
another collapsed
fortress-- these bodies
these bodies 
as strong as sand--

take a bucket of water fountain
& pour us a lake-- wet
sand to build the walls--
now you know what it's like to feel
sturdy--

i used to want to be 
cremated so someone could
open their hand & all of 
me would blow
away-- 
a playground
so much about returning
& leaving--

i once made my mother 
promise before
we went home for dinner
that my castle would 
be there the same as i left it
when we would come
back the next day--
i took a stick & wrote
Please Do Not Destroy 
in the sand--
i lingered only for a moment before
putting on my socks & shoes--

it was of course gone 
along with my petition & 
in the background the tall swings 
shuttered with the weight of
ghost children's bodies
telling their friends to
push them higher & higher
& higher

at night we bury ourselves
in the sandbox & wait for
everyone to return--
this is our homecoming--
this is where we lost 
shovels-- this is where
the water fountain becomes
a lake & children become
the ones who always knew how
to build castles--

when i die build me a 
sandcastle body-- let the rain &
the wind erase me--
write my name in the
sand with a nice stick & come
back the next day 
to make sure i was
eaten like a handful of mulch
in the mouth of a purple dinosaur--