locate your exits
& your neon blood

was it your who
poured neon into
your veins & bent
yourself into
an open sign?
was that all for me?
when you enter a
new space you
should locate your
exits-- 
red-- stamped
onto the doorway--
this is where you
will run away from
on the way home
last night
every single stop
light was red &
i felt like
god was trying to 
tell my something
about needing to
run away more slowly--
a process &
there-- face under
the red light of
god i thought about 
how red every night
is twinkles with the
lights of fire engines
laughing to each other
across the 
flat earth-- oh
the flat flat
earth-- i'm driving
towards the exit
sign hung beyond the
next mountain--
towards the outskirts
of my own body--
the tips of
my fingers-- the glow
of veins beneath 
skin-- 
by the time i 
was six i knew i
wanted to glow like
that & i asked my
uncle how they make
those neon signs--
he taught me
to blow glass &
swallow iridescence--
glow-stick boy
hung beneath the
stop light-- i grip
the steering wheel--
heart luminous--
a lantern swaying--
hold me by the handle
& hang an exit
sign 
about move forehead--
i grip the steering
wheel & resist the urge
to pray--
i ask god what he means 
by the stop lights &
if the randomness of
the universe could
succeed in holding
me so still without
the work of god--
god-- the yelp
of the sirens rushing
around me--
heart swinging--
& you weren't
there but
i wanted to call
you at that stop light--
wake you up &
ask you what you
think about at stop lights
& you'd see me
glowing
from miles away
& wonder what on
earth i might think
about at stop lights-- 
i'll never tell
you--
that's for another poem--
here i drive
sky horny & florid
he said
that neon gas is
poison-- that there
are only so many shapes
& so i curled up
in the passenger seat--
opened the glove box
& took out the user
manual for the car as if  
it were a magazine--
paging through the
instructions for
my body left there by
god-- the blue prints--
here is where his
heart will pivot on
him-- here's is
the fault-line--
i wonder if you will
still love me all
the way out to my 
finger tips-- i'm
waiting here 8 red light
away from oblivion--
locate your exits 
before you drop into
sleep
& when you come 
to the stop light--
make him wait before
you pray to him again--
the prodigal son 
with the sky in
his thumbs-- red red
as stopped blood
& neon--
i turn green &
lush--
a breath--
a lush vermilion sigh-- 
god saying
think of me
think of me
as a an exit sign