you made a casual apocalypse 

today is the apocalypse--
the end of everything--
of course
it'll pass like it
always does &
i spend most 
days thinking about
how close i am to
becoming an ending
that a sky of
fire does very little 
to shock me-- 
i make
coffee-- tear two
yellow sugar packets--
stir--
i ask the sun if 
she's getting up
or if she's resigning 
to be grey today--
i don't mind being
grey-- it's
the big finale
anyway & last night
i felt you
kiss me the whole
way home-- 
reckless-- i closed
my eyes at stop lights
in the hope of
falling asleep
& conjuring a dream 
of us--
your lips soft
honey-bee wings--
the steam
sneaking from
the rim of 
my mug of tea-- kiss after
kiss--
chapstick
leaving the gentle 
illusion that
you are coming
home with me--
i accidentally
kiss the steering
wheel-- cold--
flinch at the 
blare of the horn--
back to the apocalypse--
i'm not shocked
by this kind
of thing usually--
not by four horseman
or the crackling
streets--
i pull the blinds
closed
to keep  out
the glare of the fire--
it's best to
not give it any attention--
best to just 
let the world work
itself out--
i take a run &
think about how
maybe if i added up
all the miles
i've run this week
i could easily
have run all 
the way to you--
i would be tired
but it would
be worth it for
the romantic gesture--
i'm a mess as
you can see-- laying
in bed last night
i thought i was still
in my car & 
i reached for
the parking break--
i could feel
you reach for my hand
& we lined them
up palm to
palm-- oh 
how you make
mirrors to be broken--
park the car
on the ceiling
where it won't
come down--
gravity relinquishing
her hold on
the fading planet--
under my covers
i begin
to levitate-- lifted 
by the mischievous 
hands of angels
they're 
overcome with 
fear-- 
i fall asleep--
thinking of floating
down a river--
clear & full of
sun beam-- 
holding you
is kind of 
like that tension
at the surface of
any body
of water--
clear water lakes 
& tadpole 
pools in April-- 
the thin layer
on the surface 
that water bugs
skate across--
oh how 
i want to 
fall in
please 
kiss me again