july melodies / elegies 

i watch knots in the floor boards 
turn into bugs & remind myself those are just
where a tree once made a fist.
it is early but i can already tell
the day is full of fists & running.
my third hand clenched in my rib cabe
like a parrot. 
it cannnot get any hotter.
the walls scurry away from me 
so i grab them by the hems 
& hold our apartment together.
i wrap myself in the structure.
a robe. i pace the ceiling of myself.
my stomach is an oasis for sad thoughts
so i decide to go outside.
outside is so hot 
everything's turning to droplets.
waves radiate from the asphalt.
a chorus of birdless wings.
i walk to buy an aluminum can 
from the corner store. all the people in town
are gathered underneath the bridge
to hide from the sun. they are limp 
like overcooked pasta. 
i think vaguely about how if i were jesus
i would invite them all in my house 
where there is a lonely air conditioner 
singing its praises into the living room.
i am not a savior of anyone but
i bring them bottles of water.
before i return they turn into pigeons 
& fly where i an't reach them.
i consider buying a net to pull them down 
& force them to drink.
i tell them i am sorry for my hesistation.
i buy the aluminum 
& drink caramel water all for myself. 
a radio tells a story of more items 
i could buy. there are no other humans.
in my mind i carve a swimming pool
& fill it with aqua blue water
& pool noodles. i lay on my back.
i become an inflatable raft. 
summer invites itself into my apartment 
behind me. a heat that drums 
on all my corners. i tell the temperature
a story of being young 
& taking a bright cold shower. 
i dream up a rain storm & watch
as it doesn't arrive.
the sun rains light.
the floor boards rain memories 
of their tree-swaying. 
i rain nostalgia on my street.