frankenstein's lover

there's no easy way 
to admit to what i have done.
i watched a video online 
of a 3D printer building a beating lizard heart.
i thought of my own heart--
all the chambers full of dust. 
there's so much we can do with technology.
on my dating profile i say i want
short & long term relationships.
i sit in my empty bathtub 
& listen to a conversation 
from the apartment above. 
i can't make out the words but i pretend
someone has betrayed someone else.
they are standing right above me.
yes, i'll get to the point. 
i found a 3D printer 
in the attic of my sadness. 
in buckets i brought all kinds of cells 
& filled the ink catridges.
if you could, what would you 
bring back to life?
this is jesus-making work.
it all goes back to resurrection,
or maybe not for me because all i want 
is someone sturdy. the machine begins.
a crack of lightning juts across
a sky behind my teeth.
rocking, the printer etches muscle.
the printer catrographs
a new face. every few weeks 
i over hear someone on the train saying
"you know you cannot invent 
a human face? everyone in your dreams
is someone you've met."
this is where the machine comes in 
to correct human limits.
i want a new face. spinning eyes
into their spheres. 
yes, i've 3D printing a lover.
he/she/they will have desire 
stitched in their marrow.
a collective throbbing in the body.
they will be designed 
to want me. they will wish they could 
nest inside my rib cage.
as my lover emerges in pieces 
i speak to them. i tell the spine
"i am the one who loves you,
i am the only one." 
i sing towards the skull
"you are muse of skin."
when they are complete 
i will store them in the same attic 
they were built in. don't worry,
i will bring them flowers 
& muffins & beef jerky. 
they will not yearn for anything else.
there are no windows here. 
i will do the wanting for them.