amphibial love poem 

i have fallen in love with many frogs
by which i mean some nights 
i become amphibian. this is not 
on purpose but rather a result
of all my yearning. my skin breathes
sidewalk & dark. my eyes turn round & glossy
like cue balls. i wet my skin 
in the sink & think of salamanders:
their long bodies
& their fears. they press their skeletons
to the sides of rocks & cars while
frogs are out here in a big city
trying to make something of themselves.
my father was also an amphibian
& he clung to the sides of trees
all my life. i mistake leaves for him.
he has convinced himself he can 
reach the night sky by force of will.
he dries out near in the branches 
& turns back into a man each time.
i am ashamed of him but aren't we all
ashamed of our fathers? enough of that
let me tell you about love.
in my version of the frog prince
two frogs kiss both with the hope
of becoming human. he is 
a red-eye tree frog & i am green & nothing.
a species says it all. a bullfrog
chews on a bird & offers to crush me.
i suck the soul out of a fly.
a human blind folds me & i tell him
my safe word is "frog" he extents 
his throat. he does not listen.
it is march & soon all the stagnant waters 
will be full of frog eggs.
i remember being a tadpol. everyone pointed
& laughed at my half-legs. 
i want to go back to those blissful
first days where i thought i might be
just a fishl. as long as there's land involved
a creature can't really be happy.
i find a sweet toad & ask him
if he knows when the next train is.
he does not so we pass the time
telling stories of our past forms.
he knows he was meant to be an olive tree
& i second guess if i was meant 
to be human or to be a crow.
if i could fly i would scoop my father up
& show him the night sky
is not what he thinks it is. 
a train comes & goes. & another
& another. we part ways 
when i finally board the train.
in the distance i watch him
return to the figure 
of a skinny man with scruffy hair.
he waives & does not see me
as i also transform 
back into a short man
with skin stilling inhaling
damp wriggling night.