family reunion photo

yesterday a firework follow me home
& yelled outside my window 
as if it were a parent. what i need
is someone to fold my shirts 
to make them smaller. if i were 
the size of a thimbell i could
survive so much easier. i would 
converse with snails & i would
drink dew from blades of grass.
i am ready for a big change
which is to say i am ready
to break my favorite coffee mug
& listen to the little shards sing
an elegy. june is coming heavy as 
a bolder down the side of a mountain.
i have a mountain i'm saving 
for just such occasion. it is
chocolate & will melt by 
the end of the week. we will
lick our fingers. i can't believe
i used to think applebees was fancy.
i mean secretly i still do.
any place with garnishes 
is fancy to me. the little diner
near the dollar store used to use
mandarin oranges as garnish.
i'd eat them with my fingers 
& pretended they were slugs.
in a way, they were slugs, 
dripping with sharp citrus syrup.
spelling is for braver people. 
i have given up trying. i let
the words make use of me. 
recently, i tried to start a conversation
with a man on a bench 
who was reading a stolen newspaper.
i fumbled & asked him 
what my name was instead of his. he looked up at me
as if i were a bowl of ice.
there was no man there 
just a greeen bench. i am still
waiting for him. everyone 
is arrving soon. my dog is scratching
behind her own ears. that should be my job.
how does she sleep so much & then have the will
to get up again? lately, all my days 
are thin & rubbery. i bounce them 
on the sidewalk. children ride bikes
with blue medical masks on. 
a blue rubber glove turns
into a pigeon & back in to a glove
before my eyes. i throw out
cans of spiders before 
they hatch. i turn on another fan 
so i have two fans spinning at all times.
they are my new family. mouths open,
exhaling loud and steadily.