autobiography of a 7th grade vampire
i put my fangs in one by one
in my grimy bathroom mirror. wrapped a chain
around my neck. put ear buds in
& listened to screamo music i didn't really like.
halloween came too quickly that year. we had
a test in biology on plant cells.
all my vesitcles carried blood
like tea cups around my body.
i had too much skin & fat. i imagined
my bodies processes as i walked to school
in a black leather skirt & torn leggings.
wanted to be truely undead.
where would i hide in this town?
i would use the old limestone kilns
by the creek as cripts. cross my arms
over my chest & sleep away the sun.
there would be no more memorised structures
or equations or locker rooms where girls
inspected each other's stomachs.
face painted dollar-store makeup white.
some smeared on my hands. i was coming apart
already. wiped my palms on a patch of dead grass.
black lipstick. black fingernails.
i would have to feed on squirrels
& field mice. even this sounded easier
than hallway-shoes & mouths beating
like bat wings. i loved nothing about my body
for a whole year & more
but in the costume
i felt possible. like, in the future
i might hold a then intangible power.
outside, on the walk to school, all the trees
were still performing photosythesis
& the grass too probably. i always thought of it
as little hands scoops sugar
from the sun & stuffing it into thousands
of miniature lips. i wished i could
feed myself like that. i thought about how vampires
are kind of the opposite of plants. we had to take
what was not readily replenished.
we had to feed in a way that was
irrevocably detructive. in homeroom
i folded my hands on the desk. winced
at the orange sun brimming through
the wide classroom window. wishing
i was immortal. the bell rang.
i forgot the names of half the plant's structures
& just wrote "blood" over & over.
after school i tried to turn into a bat.
but instead followed my thighs
back up the street & across the field
to my home by the corn fields
to take off my face. i could hear
the leaves eating their last bites
before turning red & orange & brown.