rentable boyfriend

we can take this by the hour 
or by the day. if it's better for you,
decide as you go 
what length you'd like to attempt my body.
consider me a parking meter or a hotel room. 
i'll be whatever kind of temporary you want.
in the city, i drove by a store where you could rent
anything: fridges & beds & folding chairs.
i imagined the brief thrill 
of those pleasures. i am renting
my soul from someone else. it's silky
& at night sometimes dances like a ribbon.
i'm paying by the month. it almost feels mine.
tell me love, what are you borrowing? 
what are you earning?
sometimes i dream of perminance. i look up
houses for sale nearby. page through their photos
knowing i can't render that kind of realness.
i bought a sink & sat it in the hallway
waiting for the water to flow all by itself. 
i'm open to whatever brevities you're craving.
let's eat trees. let's pinch donuts
& fill our throats with powdered sugar.
for the time being i'm whatever you need.
we can walk down to the lake & toss in
our old shoes or just sit on the couch
& stare the television to gold. 
once, i rented myself beautiful 
for a night in april.
a teenager, i knew nothing about how 
increasingly hard it would be to experience 
fixed glimmer. stood on rented mountains.
ate rented words. kissed rented mouths.
the difference was i trusted it all.
cars drove like whales of diamond. 
the boy who rented me paid me in 
fingers & shoulders. how could i
have let myself be chosen so easily?
not again though. now we know 
what we'll be to each other. measurements
of distance. the length of my chest
to yours. a rented door knob 
to a rented heart. tell me please
what kind of palpable are you craving?

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