for a small monthly fee
you too can experience the otherworldly.
i hold my credit card up
to the wild full moon & exclaim
that i would like to sign up
for a haunting. people try
to be specific. ask for grandmothers
or famous artists but
you cannot tell a haunting what you want.
it is about giving yourself up. i sat
waiting with my back to the wall.
doesn't it always feel like
someone else is standing right behind you?
that is only the beginning.
the haunting tracing its fingers
across all the surfaces in the house.
it wonders what it would like
to show you. before the haunting
i believed in being alone. i sulked,
stared up at the ceiling like
it might lift away & give me stars.
now i know i am surrounded. ghost heart beat
in every lightbulb & end table.
my haunting laughs like waving curtains.
drop forks on the floor
in the middle of the night.
when i go to pick them up
sometimes there's my name
carved into a wall or, just yesterday,
the dining room table. of course there is
the thrilling fear but then
something else. a comfort. knowing that
nothing is ever complete.
my haunting once told me
she milked cows when she was a girl.
told me this in a whisper
when i was in a thought tunnel
about feeling less-than real.
i picture her hands & then they arrive
to turn fresh apples to rot.
my life is so much more tangible
& yours can be too. there is no reason
to live unhaunted. in fact,
i start to wonder how people do it.
i look around & see their empty windows
& wonder what keeps their inhabitants
stay alive. i am followed
by so many bare feet. i now sleep in
crowded rooms. all thanks to
the service of the spectral.
i wouldn't want to live any other way.
you can live like this too.
imagine this: cool air on the back
of your neck. goosebumps vine
up your arms & legs. you see
an appartition standing in the dining room.
she drops a glass. it shatters
& wakes a coiled piece of your soul
you didn't know you still had.