driver's license photo
i put my head inside an official document.
gender is not just what you are but how
you are processed. i scan my gender
& buy a steering wheel from a corner store.
i learned to drive in the church parking lot
where even the rose bushes were disciplines.
have you ever thought of the distance between
disciple & discipline? i don't know how
to live with this many questions. i am a real
& photographed person. this is proof
i am not a vampire or at least that i was not
when i entered into another system.
then there is the memory. the machine was
a one-way mirror but i know on the other side
was someone who also carried a little proof
of themselves inside a cave. i want to give
less of my teeth to the internet. consider deleting
part of my life thus far. they say it is perminent
but one day won't i be ozymandias-ing like
the rest of us? i select my gender as
"bird" & accept any consequence that might come.
flight risk. flower risk. information risk.
here is my advice. give yourself a secret name
only you know. hold that name like a knife
& then you can say, "you do not have all of me"
knowing full well that one day they will have
a device that can reach into anyone's past thoughts
to pluck out whatever quail egg they had tried to save.
i do not know if i really need to be secret
but it is what i crave. to drive through the night
without a thumb print or a trail of alphabet.
just a body & a shovel & a gender still
wet from hatching. beating my moth wings.
stealing the eyes out of every stoplight.