no signal 

ring my screen
black-- there
i am dissolving
in the high beams of
my green volvo-- when 
did we all become
so alone?
so easily disbanded?
i was tethered 
like we all were--
dangling at the mercy
of space--
oh my love
how i wish 
your were here
to ride home with me--
your voice a caravan
of stars--
i drive home 
through 
the mountains
the trees stretching
taller-- growing
cracked fingers &
ribs-- laughing--
i watched
as they stole the sky--
dug in their nails--
the forest 
where
the darkness 
is bold
enough to wear 
a voice &
where the deer wander
diamond-eyed 
in the road-- their
stare defined & humanoid--
i pull over--
cell phone screen
gone
black-- the creek
with a body of a 
siren-- she sings 
a restless moon
song & the deer follows
his mother--
twig snap
but oh then there
is no ground
beneath me &
satellites cannot
find me & if god
isn't watching
from his orbit who
is? there 
at the mercy of
the trees laughing 
fingers i feel my
name evaporate-- fog
the car windows--
i wiped them
clear with my sleeve--
left hand prints
on the glass
in an attempt
to remember
what you call me--
& my knuckles
knotted like
oak knees & 
there was nothing
left but darkness
holding me-- the 
fur on my neck
standing up-- cradled
i buckled & curled
into myself--
opened my mouth
to beg for a star
to recognize what
i had become-- 
diamond-eyed child
of hooves & 
the unknown-- 
this is home now--
this is where i detached
from the mothering
eyes of my satellites--
the road a hologram 
to keep me from
falling in love
with the darkness of
my own fur--
bend down with me
& drink from
the cold waters of
this creek with no
name-- winter
sobbing into stone--
when you find
me drive
slowly-- listen
to the sound of
your feet leaving
the ground--
or of course you
could stay inside
your car & trust
your mother's skirt
hem-- grab on
for the ride-- keep
going until you find 
a street light-- your
phone a glow
against
your face-- the whites
of your eyes grasping
at a sliver of moon--
i came back of course
somehow-- my name
tasting
wrongly in my
mouth-- the road 
driving me-- 
imitating the insides
of my bones-- marrow-
night-- the highway
a sharp inhale--
distrusting
the ground beneath me
i climb the stairs  
back up to my room--
tuck my knees
into my chest & 
lay in bed-- the 
crooked fingers 
of the trees pressed
up against the window
they want me 
back-- they want me back
i take out my eyes
& set them by
the bed