mood ring

if we all wore
mood rings 
you could hold
me tight between
your finger
& your thumb until
i blushed blue 
& in love with you--
you could read 
me-- change
my temperature
& i could
press you
until you became
beige & restless--
when i was 8 
i got a mood
ring at a gift
shop
on the beach & 
i spent the 
next few days holding
the glossy colorful
surface to
different locations
on my body--
my neck-- the skin
of my soft palms--
this is 
how i discovered
the shades of
my blood-- my
soul dripping cyan &
yellow--
lime green 
& adventurously red
did you know
a soul could
be red? 
& when you hold me
i won't know
what color i'll turn
because i've long 
since lost my mood rings--
given up
on the colors 
laying beneath
dormant
in my body--
somewhere on
the beaches of
assateague between
waves eager
to finally break 
& the gritty sand
caked on my
knees
i lost my mood ring
while searching 
for the color
pink inside my--
i was delving
for the uncertain--
the fearful--
the froth of 
surf & sunset 
bruising in
the distance--
if you clasp
yourself
tight enough you
can become 
any color & so
i did &
now i'm 21 
& i don't have a 
mood ring 
but when you
cupped me
like water i leaked
auburn & amber--
wild & mauve 
you let me go--
you let me seep 
into the soil--
a rainbow in
formation-- a
wave attempting
to break--
come here & let
me coax the colors
from under
your skin-- 
i want to
see your grey-
blue soul shake
water
from your hair--
& when i lost
my mood ring
i felt 
oddly free-- as if
i no longer
had a barometer
for my heart beat--
as if the 
only color i had to
feel was the
red throbbing 
of my sunburn 
shoulders-- peeling
as i surveyed
the damages
in a full length mirror--
i stung all
over-- heat pulsing--
i wondered
what color 
i would be if i hadn't
lost the mood
ring
in the ocean--
if i hadn't warn
it so dangerously
& i wept
indigo & vermilion--
amaranth & aquamarine--
laughing--
oh let me
hold you tonight--
there are so many hues
left to surface in
you--
i want to
touch you-- i want
to help you feel
them--
look our hands
are amethyst--
trust me--
put on this mood
ring &
run away 
into the azure
ocean with me--
this time we'll
get lost 
on purpose--
break with me
in rainbows--
press me to your
neck--
your blood
was sunset bruised
& mine was
still sunburned 
& red