invisibility cloaks & where to find them

1. 
sleepover-wrapped 
ourselves in 
green comforters--

closed eyes &
fumbled in nightlight
fire--

i'm not sure
why we'd shut our eyes 
but it seemed to enhance 
the idea that we 
had found invisibility--

& when i'd open mine
i watched you-- 

arms stretched out-- 

feeling for the 
legs of my bunk bed--

2.
what we move when
we think we're alone
with our body--

2.
alone in my room
i ran my hand along the 
carpet in search 
of the back of an earring
& discovered 
an unsee-able texture

3.
closed my eyes &
pulled the clothe 
like a plastic bag over
my head

3.
the mirrors in the house
fogged over
& i re-arranged my
brother's quarter collection--

stealing the ones from
Georgia to devour
the big juicy
silver peach

4.
when was the first
time you found an invisibility cloak?

4.
was it underneath 
a greening heads-up penny?
did you keep it in
your pencil case?

5.
did you stay up past
your bedtime to see what
adults watch on tv at night?

5.
dark screen &
my mother's shiny pink
knitting needles
clicking like
finger nails on the windows
6.
recess under the
oak tree 

the boys played football
with the round rubber
playground ball
& the girls hung upside
down on the jungle gym--
6.
i crouched--knees in dirt

unfurled the cloak--
pulled over my shoulders

a stick to 
dig in the earth--
wrote my name to
remind myself that there
was a body left somewhere
for me even

7.
i began to use it more
frequently

without intention

kept it folded in
the top of my desk

7.
during silent reading time
i'd slip it one 
& pace the single 
yellow-tile hallway 
outside class 

examining teachers 
open their packed lunches
lowfat yogurts &
lean cuisines--

smell of coffee grains
from the grey trash bin--
8.
i'd go to the bathroom 

remove the cloak 
to stand in the mirror--
trace the lines of my
training bra beneath 
my shirt--

re-dress--
eyeing myself
as i became comfortable
& blank

8.
i thought of my uncle's 
grey artist's erasers--
the ones you can mold into
different shapes--
i rubbed them on
my skin till it turned red

8.
ambled invisibly into the boys--

the urinals like space pods

the soap was sterile &
pink like ours

i washed my hands--

9.
my younger brother noticed
the disappearing
one afternoon
asked if he could try 

i didn't want
him to feel snared like
i did

kept it in my pillowcase  
& we balanced on
the railroad tracks
that dusk--

he asked if the trains
ever come through 
kutztown anymore

10.
growing up is probably
best done 
without invisibility

10.
i've made up memories
to fill in the gaps

drawn in crayon
& ball point pen
on the roots of the oak tree

10.
next time you sleepover 
you will tell me 
that you wear wire bras 

i took mine off
in your bathroom mirror

time lapsed  &
the sun dipped &
rose-- dipped & rose
like a round corn chip
in fresh salsa

cilantro also 
smells like strong rain
11.
in 7th grade we 
dissected starfish 
& afterwards i lost control

slipped into the cloak--

i was thinking
of how the mouth
of the star fish is
at the center--

all debris moving inward--

i ended up in the dark 
of the kiln room--

i think the art teacher knew
i hide there 

the beaded door rustled
as she flicked off the light
& headed home

12.
let me show you how 
to be unobserved 

13.
close your eyes
& wait for the sensation
of clothe over your face--

the embalming fluid
will taste like cilantro 
or rain

14.
in the 10th grade
my mother caught me
late at night disappearing

i was supposed to 
have been better 

we cried on the carpet 
of my bed room in the 
shadow of my bunk bed's
skinny thighs--

used each other
like microphones--

i don't remember
what she said to me

15.
it is best done with
a friend--

do you trust me?

16.
trust has the texture
of brown paper napkins

like ones 
in public bathrooms
or Chick-fil-a

17.
there are so many 
invisibilities here
on the floor of this
bedroom--

17.
wrap yourself in
a comforter

what would you 
do if your skin was invisible?

17.
all that blood

salsa red as the 
tumbling sun 

18.
empty the mirrors

19.
don't let them know 

20.
get older

21.
trace the
railroad tracks
under your shirt

21.
call your brother
but don't let
him know you have skin